craash

sigh. i was really manic b/f xmas. i knew the whole time i was going to crash. this sux. i hurt phisically and mentally. i cant do anything but lie on my floor and not think. i cant think. im not feeling srry 4 myself b/c theres nothing to be sad a bout. i just cant move. i cant think. il be ok. mayber tomorrow or the next day. usually during certain parts of the day i just get spells where i cant move, when im depressed.
when im manic im awesome and happy and i cant stop moving. (my foot) and i love it. but then bam. it hits hard and sometimes i cry. theres nothing i can do about it. i pray to god that he will help me to feel better and get up. i have faith in my heart that he'll hear me and help me. that's all i can do. theres nothing wrong really, it just happens, and i kno im not the only one hurting. so now. i just lie on my floor and not think. die. for now.