A happening I will always remember

I was getting ready for the meeting this morning and Ben came in my room. He was using my leave in conditioner and he for some reason just stood there. He was almost hesitating.
"Can I see something?" He asked kinda slow. I looked at him funny and gave a shrug. Ben and I don't talk much so I'm a little awkward around him. I felt pain in my chest as soon as he picked up my wrist. I couldn't help it I just started to cry. I'm still so ashamed at my weakness. He saw right away and hugged me closely.
"Mali, I love you so much. I would never judge you for this. It's not that bad. You saw your mistake and you are moving on. You are a beautiful girl and I love you so much ok? You have no idea how much I love you..I know we dont talk much..you are so pretty, you have no idea what my friends say about you. Just do your thing and what you know is right. I know it's hard and sometimes confusing. If you ever need to talk to me you can call me or anything ok? I love you so much." He kept hugging me and wiping my tears away. I think that was the closest I've ever been to him in my life, and I realize that no matter how far he gets and even though he makes stupid descisions, I love him. I had to write this somewhere. I will never forget it. He left the church so things between us have been weird, but now I see that I can have a really good relationship with him..I dont know really what to say, but just writing this is making me cry. I want to forget this past experience a lot. I want it to leave. I think this is finally that last time that I will have to remember it, and I'm glad. I just wanted the world to know that Ben is the best brother a person could ever have.

girl's night out :)

me and mel...
VICTORY!!!! <3
Me, getting out of being tied up...
Slightly frightened and laughing a little..THEY TACKLED ME!
Mel, eating MY cookie...
Phoebe...she's the sweetest little girl ever :)
our dish..lol ewww
Becky in the kitchen...
Carrie and Margaret
Audrey
WE're thinking Arby's :P
Me boiling water...I cannot cook..so that was my job lol
Mel...and a huge knife...
Me and Margaret...
Mel and Margaret..these girls..u put them together and u get so much trouble..u should see the things they do!

ALMOST THERE

Two weeks of school left!!! then I will be on vacation! I will go to Norway and France! Mariel and I will take the bullet train to Paris for a day, because we are staying in a town near the French-German border. (fraincais-allemand) :P im really excited and I will absolutely have LOTS of pics!!!

hmm

hhmmm my posts are randomly being deleted...

em

me :P
mariel..ohh shes gonna be mad for this
suzanne, and charlotte
this is the best pic i could ever find of em, she hates having pics taken. this was the last time i saw her. :)

meh

meh mehmehmehemmehmehmehmehmeh
yea i lost 5 lbs. who cares. it was random. im bleh.i want it to be monday or tuesday really bad. meh. :P

mmm

Today Aaron and I biked to Audrey's house and spent the afternoon with her. We got ice cream but I could hardly eat it. I dunno, I just wasn't feeling up to it. I didn't finish...haha didn't get close to finishing.
I lost five pounds, according to two different scales at two different houses. I don't know how that could be, but my weight was the same on both..soooo yeah. I haven't told my mom, cause I hate being accused of starving myself and/or not eating enough. I know I eat enough, and I drink a lot of milk..thanks to someone :) I guess that it's just a teen thing, cause it was random. Oh well, I dont mind. It's not like im underweight or anything..I'm basically in the right zone, so I dont care much.
I dont have much to say today, but PLEASE read my story and tell me what you think. It's not finished yet, but it's getting there :) (not really) Just make sure you go to the first post of it on compromiseme.blogspot.com thanks!!! the more input the better!
<3 Mali Mali!

POND BODOM!!!!

the woods!!!





OMG it was SOOO MUDDY! I was able to clean my shoes though :) I took so many pictures! I love the landscapes!!!!

no words

hmm I've been thinking about my uncle lately, and the mistake he made. I have been lately considering all the things he is missing. a new age is developing in the church and I believe he wouldnt be able to resist returning, i think. Oh well, im sure everything happens for a reason.
I dont have much to say tonight :P im quite happy :D and SO awake...

these are the days

hmm NO UPDATE! I HAVE NO PATIENCE FOR THIS!! LOL no one even reads it. i know like 2 haha. hmmm NIZMA coming up and guess who cannot play her solo?!! and im missing Anette's wedding for it! lol this is crazy. oh well. i had a normal day. David and i decided we were going to set out school up as a feudal society :P Im SHOGUN and he's the figure-head emperor. If ppl refuse to listen, they have to commit seppiku..and if they wont, we release MRS. APPLEMAN on them!!! LOL (this would be what we do during lunch) I wanted him to stand on the table and yell "THIS PLACE NEEDS TO BE DEVEOPED POLITICALLY!!!!" i was gonna pay him ten bucks. David looks rather like a rat when he does impressions of ppl. lol. mom dont tell him i say so.

pics that are random

Margaret and Mansa(she'll kill me for this :P)
Kap and jon
Joe after cut
before cut
Sam
Sonja and Jonny having their birthday! They had it the same night cause the dates are so close. Two cakes? Now my mother is spoiling I think...
Sonja<3 onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhp2dcSk2wkoY8xrDCOOvRiuxD2qZF0NUvOpGdPDJlKkvtG-Y0of6La-6qYic4rjRPTrkp1Qex8so0APNdnb8fGlS6VhKX5mQmMWSrGF2-ZDLlanw04u88mN59x-Nb0DNBjFRgUtnBS1vq/s1600-h/001.JPG">Mansa (Camille) playing
Kathryn,a and Jonny
Mansa during the meeting..yes.. I admit I lost interest
Me and Victoria!
Jonny, aka Mr. Pirate! :P
Me as pirate, I know, unenthusiastic... I wear that necklace all the time

Abigail and Aaron having some fun with it...Yes, she's looking lovely :P

mmm excerps from everyday life

mm what to say about today?

I woke up at about 6:00 this morning and bolted upright. I just sat there for a moment until I realized that I had like 45 mins left to sleep. I took a shower and got dressed. I thought and felt with all my heart that today would be a great day. I smiled and ate a breakfast of Grape fruit, yogurt and orange juice. I went to school and enjoyed lab, band, French, and bio. But then lunch.
Brett was fine today, he didn't bother me and Nathan wasn't there. David was making me hyperventilate, I was choking on my pbj and laughing at him. Liz, ofc was her normal self. But my bro Aaron and my cuz/friend Audrey decided to be jerks. I'm not just feeling sorry for myself. I tried to join in on their convo and be fun and all, but was rejected. They didnt bother to wait for me to walk with them, so I ended up walking my myself. I dunno. I dont want to sit with them anymore. I'm tired of being treated like shit. Sorry, but that's what it is. And mom, u dont need to give Aaron a "talk", he know's how he and audrey are. I am tired of it.
SOOOOOO tomorrow, I get to eat with some other people. I dont know who. There's a table of girls in my grade that I kinda hang out with in other classes, but I dunno. I dont like eating in front of people. Whenever people hand out snacks I can never eat one..I'm just like that. I dont want to be dramatic, I'm just saying how it is. I dont know how well I could eat with them.
There's no one else to sit with. I could sit with the crazy religous girl Kasey, but she doesnt like me and she is suspicious of anyone. hmm maybe I will. What if I sat at the emo-weird people table? haha that wouldn't work. I'm too shy to ask. If anyone has ANY suggestions..if ur secretly reading my blog or something..then please, help me...cause I am not sitting with those people anymore.

amazingness

so today i had a good day. that's all there is to say. i have writing to do

waiting it out

I know she loves me. IM just hacing trouble. Im not leaving the church, but sometimes it feels like ppl think i am. man. i guess i just have to keep living so what if they think i am, they're just people.